Monday, December 04, 2006
An observation of grief
Psalm 18:30 – The ways of God are without fault.
When God doesn’t do what we want or expect, it’s not easy…it never will be.
In C.S. Lewis’s book, ‘A Grief Observed’ (written after his own wife died of cancer) he states, ‘Your belief…for God or no God, for a good God or the Cosmic Sadist, for eternal life or nonentity…will not be serious if nothing much is staked on it. And you will never discover how serious your faith is until the stakes are raised horribly high,’
How does one cope? I know that over time the sorrow...the loss...the pain will diminish. But, what about right now? What do I do? How do I handle the fact that my kids will grow up, go off to college, get married and raise their own kids without the help, wisdom or love and support of their mother? As the kids grow, there will be things that Amy would have provided that I simply can not. Traits that she carried and provided that I don’t possess. I know that the only way I have made it thus far and will continue to make it through the grief is to rely on God for peace…strength and wisdom. You see, if in your grief, sorrow and pain, you do not turn to God and the wisdom of His word for guidance and solace, you will be hard pressed to even have the desire to get out of bed in the morning! When in your grief you find that you do not even want to leave the house...or you find that you don't even care anymore, turn to God's word and read of His love...read of His caring nature and read of the great compassion that He has for you. Immerse yourself, take every opportunity you can to drench yourself in His word and I guarantee you will find within its passages a healing balm like no other! It is said that time heals all wounds, why wait that long! Within His word, healing begins today! It’s okay to be sad and to grieve. It is okay to ask God questions and ask Him to reveal more of Himself; it is His desire for us to search for and to know Him and to be real with Him and experience His comfort and love. Matthew 7:7-8 says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." Go on and start today, after all what do you have to lose? Nothing..but you will gain your life!
Faith is the conviction that God knows more than we do about this life and He will get us through it.
For the love of Amy - V
When God doesn’t do what we want or expect, it’s not easy…it never will be.
In C.S. Lewis’s book, ‘A Grief Observed’ (written after his own wife died of cancer) he states, ‘Your belief…for God or no God, for a good God or the Cosmic Sadist, for eternal life or nonentity…will not be serious if nothing much is staked on it. And you will never discover how serious your faith is until the stakes are raised horribly high,’
How does one cope? I know that over time the sorrow...the loss...the pain will diminish. But, what about right now? What do I do? How do I handle the fact that my kids will grow up, go off to college, get married and raise their own kids without the help, wisdom or love and support of their mother? As the kids grow, there will be things that Amy would have provided that I simply can not. Traits that she carried and provided that I don’t possess. I know that the only way I have made it thus far and will continue to make it through the grief is to rely on God for peace…strength and wisdom. You see, if in your grief, sorrow and pain, you do not turn to God and the wisdom of His word for guidance and solace, you will be hard pressed to even have the desire to get out of bed in the morning! When in your grief you find that you do not even want to leave the house...or you find that you don't even care anymore, turn to God's word and read of His love...read of His caring nature and read of the great compassion that He has for you. Immerse yourself, take every opportunity you can to drench yourself in His word and I guarantee you will find within its passages a healing balm like no other! It is said that time heals all wounds, why wait that long! Within His word, healing begins today! It’s okay to be sad and to grieve. It is okay to ask God questions and ask Him to reveal more of Himself; it is His desire for us to search for and to know Him and to be real with Him and experience His comfort and love. Matthew 7:7-8 says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." Go on and start today, after all what do you have to lose? Nothing..but you will gain your life!
Faith is the conviction that God knows more than we do about this life and He will get us through it.
For the love of Amy - V
# posted by Vince @ 9:07 PM 
Comments:
<< Home
Hi Vince,
Thanks for your words of encouragement! When I know that you are grieving and you still write to encourage others it amazes me and I know it is of God that you're able to do that. We hope that Trevor is feeling better and we'll both be at your house with bells on tomorrow night! I'm going to bring along my camera in the event Brit has a cheerleading event so I can go take some snapshots. -I never cared for wrestling as a sport myself but I'm more than ready to endure so I can get some good photos.
Love ya, Bonnie & Dave
Thanks for your words of encouragement! When I know that you are grieving and you still write to encourage others it amazes me and I know it is of God that you're able to do that. We hope that Trevor is feeling better and we'll both be at your house with bells on tomorrow night! I'm going to bring along my camera in the event Brit has a cheerleading event so I can go take some snapshots. -I never cared for wrestling as a sport myself but I'm more than ready to endure so I can get some good photos.
Love ya, Bonnie & Dave
# posted by 
: 10:29 PM, December 04, 2006
: 10:29 PM, December 04, 2006
Vince, you are right time will lessen the pain. I can also promise you that years from now something will trigger a thought of Amy and no matter what the life situation, it will again overwhelm you. This is a journey that God has given you and the Kids. Don't feel pity for them. Its OK to feel sad and grieve for the loss, miss her, but as you said, This is God's plan for you all. This will help make them the person God intends them to be. Who knows maybe Brit will cure Cancer, Hope may become a nurse or giref councelor, no that will be Vinney. He has an unbelieveable spirit, it actually sees and feels on many cosmic levels. He was born with it, and a great part of that was Amy. The humor is what I miss. I believe Vinney did hear his mother, and I believe she was talking to him, because he didn't go in before and say good bye, and tell her its ok to go and that he would be ok. Someday he will realize and may need your help understanding, she understood his fear. He will miss not telling her good bye some day when he is older and can put his feelings into better words. In true Amy fashion she reached to her Vinney, worried about his comfort.Don't be surprised if he hears her. Angels are among us.
This may sound totally strange to you and someday I would love to have this conversation with you. Brit too.
I think you have been given a blessing having 4 parts of Amy to hold onto and cherish. Each child to watch on their walks through life here on earth. Take care of yourself Vince they need you to fill in the blanks, We Newgent's will continue to help and pray for the Howard's. Keeping the faith
Please feel free to not print this or modify it.
Eric and Janie
This may sound totally strange to you and someday I would love to have this conversation with you. Brit too.
I think you have been given a blessing having 4 parts of Amy to hold onto and cherish. Each child to watch on their walks through life here on earth. Take care of yourself Vince they need you to fill in the blanks, We Newgent's will continue to help and pray for the Howard's. Keeping the faith
Please feel free to not print this or modify it.
Eric and Janie
# posted by : 11:39 PM, December 04, 2006
: 11:39 PM, December 04, 2006
We are praying and thinking of all of you.
God Bless.
The Penzkovers
God Bless.
The Penzkovers
# posted by : 8:11 AM, December 06, 2006
: 8:11 AM, December 06, 2006
DEAR VINCE, SORRY I AHVE NOT WRITTEN TO YOU IN SO LONG, SHORTLY AFTER AMY'S FUNERAL, I GOT THR CALL; FROM MY DAUGHTER, THAT HER FIANCEE HAD COMMITED SUICIDE. IT HAS BEEN A LONG MONTH FOR ME. I WILL TALK TO YOU SOON , HOWEVER RIGHT NOW I AM TO TIRED. LOVE YOU ALL, YOUR COUSININ PHOENIX.
Post a Comment
# posted by : 10:39 PM, December 06, 2006
: 10:39 PM, December 06, 2006 << Home
